bobandrubert Posted November 20, 2005 Share Posted November 20, 2005 Only in America.....do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. ! Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. Only in America......do they have drive up ATM machines with Braille lettering. EVER WONDER .... Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? ! Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad78 Posted November 20, 2005 Share Posted November 20, 2005 Where did you find these? http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a359/Mad78/Palpycard.gifhttp://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a359/Mad78/Spamkinguserbarcopy.jpgCLICK HERE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT!!!Click here is you like Trance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BadSamaritan Posted November 20, 2005 Share Posted November 20, 2005 It's en email, been circulating around the web for years. makes a few valid points, however, especially about politics. I once knew a great man. Nothing got to him, and he always smiled. May he forever rest in peace, knowing fully well that his freinds shall remember him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthTofu Posted November 20, 2005 Share Posted November 20, 2005 Okay, here's one: If electricity comes from electrons, then does that mean that morality comes from morons? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? That one was either stolen by or from a season one episode of NCIS. Still, great quotes... This stuff is my new IM profile. 12/14/07Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la Not gone, merely marching far away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jahled Posted November 20, 2005 Share Posted November 20, 2005 Good post Bobandrupert! The psychic and the lottery does it for me. Brilliant. http://www.jahled.co.uk/smallmonkeywars.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aenivae_Ikeda Posted November 22, 2005 Share Posted November 22, 2005 Only in America can you get a pizza faster than a cop... "I saw the greatest minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving, hysterical, naked, dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix." -Allen Ginnsberg, "Howl" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobandrubert Posted November 22, 2005 Author Share Posted November 22, 2005 Thank you! and good one Aenivae_Ikeda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aenivae_Ikeda Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 You know you guys don't have to spell the full name out... You can just put Aen or something... Just thought I'd let yall know... err yeah. "I saw the greatest minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving, hysterical, naked, dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix." -Allen Ginnsberg, "Howl" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthTofu Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 How 'bout we make creative anagrams using only a couple of letters from your name from now on, vein dak? 12/14/07Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la Not gone, merely marching far away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Scathane Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 Brilliant! And, of course, don't forget Americans drive in a parkway and park in a driveway... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mitth_raw_nuruodo Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 U beat me to it Scathane. Curse this lack of an internet connection at home! Chaos, Panic, Disorder, Destruction.....My work here is done. Grand AKmiralCommander-in-Chief of BEAK Forces(CINCBEAK) BEAK Imperium"To BEAK is Divine!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Defender_16 Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. I don't think that applies just to the states. Only in America......do they have drive up ATM machines with Braille lettering. We used to have one of those in town. The bank got rid of it after the King Street Toughies tried to break it open the third or fourth time. Brilliant! And, of course, don't forget Americans drive in a parkway and park in a driveway...I love it. I cant believe I never really noticed that before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trejiuvanat Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Brilliant! And, of course, don't forget Americans drive in a parkway and park in a driveway...I love it. I cant believe I never really noticed that before. Didn't we have a thread about it years back? Good list, b&r http://www.swrebellion.com/~jahled/Trej/banner.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General_Crespin Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. ! That's always really, really bugged me. WTF is the point!? http://crespin.xwlegacy.net/pics/Shadowkeeper99a.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Scathane Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Well, apparently, Americans feel/think/hope/wish that the Diet Coke will nullify the double calories they take in with the other stuff... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Krytos Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Well, apparently, Americans feel/think/hope/wish that the Diet Coke will nullify the double calories they take in with the other stuff... Unfortunately, they're not the only ones - Australia has well and truly joined that band wagon. I work in a Fish n' Chip store (hopefully for not much longer), and we constantly get people ordering greasy food and want to wash it down with a Diet Coke (or now, the new Coke Zero). I constantly fight the urge to tell them what I think There is one guy who is on the top of this list for me. Every Saturday for about 3 months in a row, this guy would come in and order 3 double cheeseburgers, large chips, some flake and potato cakes (for two people) and end it off with a 1.5 litre diet coke.Not only is the Diet Coke redundant after that binge of grease, there's that much of it by itself that there's no point bothering with the diet variant. Ah, that's my gripe for tonight http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/1778/reloadedbannerdu8.gifhttp://img152.imageshack.us/img152/1333/3dartistbanneranimationws1.gifhttp://img154.imageshack.us/img154/4026/rebellionbannerdi2.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthTofu Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 People drink diet coke because then they can eat more. Think about it: If you set a number of calories you will allow yourself for the day (And I realize that most people don't) you can have say two cheeseburgers and a diet coke as opposed to one cheeseburger and a regular coke... Or they could just like the taste better! 12/14/07Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la Not gone, merely marching far away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mitth_raw_nuruodo Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Or else it's just the fact that my theory is correct. My theory is that "People are Stupid!" You can find some of my supporting evidence at http://www.darwinawards.com. Enjoy. Chaos, Panic, Disorder, Destruction.....My work here is done. Grand AKmiralCommander-in-Chief of BEAK Forces(CINCBEAK) BEAK Imperium"To BEAK is Divine!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Scathane Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 People drink diet coke because then they can eat more. Think about it: If you set a number of calories you will allow yourself for the day (And I realize that most people don't) you can have say two cheeseburgers and a diet coke as opposed to one cheeseburger and a regular coke... You're right, of course... but the same would go for regular cheeseburgers and regular fries, as opposed to double cheeseburgers and large fries. And, with regard to Diet Coke, it contains caffeine, aspartame and phosphoric acid, all of which enjoy wide 'renown' due to health controversy. Not that I don't enjoy a good coke every now and then, let alone a diet coke... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad78 Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Or else it's just the fact that my theory is correct. My theory is that "People are Stupid!" You can find some of my supporting evidence at http://www.darwinawards.com. Enjoy.I love the Darwin Awards. I have the book I don't really like normal coke let alone diet one.I am an Ice Tea person. Love the stuff. http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a359/Mad78/Palpycard.gifhttp://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a359/Mad78/Spamkinguserbarcopy.jpgCLICK HERE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT!!!Click here is you like Trance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Scathane Posted January 10, 2006 Share Posted January 10, 2006 Do you mean home made ice tea or the product version? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth_Rob Posted January 10, 2006 Share Posted January 10, 2006 I hate that "sun-rendered tea junk". My dad makes it every summer, with a huge pot of stinking tea on the porch. I am forever tempted to give it a little nudge off the porch, sending it hurtling to the ground where it would smash against the rocks, thus ending the life of that particular glass jar. But I do enjoy a nice glass of iced green tea every now and again. PS- I only drink Coke when I go out to eat, and will only drink a regular Coke. I'd rather drink a butt load of sugar than all the odds and ends that make their way into Diet Coke. Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the Dark Side! My Website http://fp.profiles.us.playstation.com/playstation/psn/pid/BigBadBob113.png Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad78 Posted January 10, 2006 Share Posted January 10, 2006 Do you mean home made ice tea or the product version?Product version. http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a359/Mad78/Palpycard.gifhttp://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a359/Mad78/Spamkinguserbarcopy.jpgCLICK HERE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT!!!Click here is you like Trance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Scathane Posted January 10, 2006 Share Posted January 10, 2006 I must admit, I could find no ill ingredients in the Lipton product (presuming you meant that brand)... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General_Crespin Posted January 10, 2006 Share Posted January 10, 2006 I really like Dr. Pepper and Mug Root Beer from soda fountains. If they did the mixture right, it beats the bottled stuff by a mile. But, chocolate milk forever. http://crespin.xwlegacy.net/pics/Shadowkeeper99a.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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