Jokes

[Phantom_pff]

Due to the fact that most people are feeling down and sad about the most recent news for EAW i have decided (and i hope the mods don't mind) to post some of the jokes i have on word files on my computer. And i hope you guys shair yours, I ask tho that you don't use vulgar language and keep it at most PG13.

 

Logic

 

 

Two South Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave.

 

The next day Jim goes down to the college and meets the dean of admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: math, English, history, and logic.

 

"Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?"

 

The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weedeater?"

 

"Yeah," replies Jim.

 

"Then logically, because you own a weedeater, I think that you would have a yard."

 

"That's true, I do have a yard."

 

"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house."

 

"Yes, I do have a house."

 

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."

 

"I have a family."

 

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife."

 

"Yes, I do have a wife."

 

"And because you have a wife, then logically you must be a heterosexual."

 

"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weedeater."

 

Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for math, English, history, and logic.

 

"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"

 

Jim says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weedeater?"

 

"No."

 

"Then you're a queer"

[Dorkthehunter]

there might be another place to put these, but i can't find it so:

 

There are two cows in a pasture. One says to the other: "Have you heard about the mad cow disease?"

The other one replies: "Why do I care? I'm a helicopter!"

[RogueCommander]

Blond jokes:

A blind man walks into a bar and goes to the bartender.

He asks "Want to hear a blond joke?"

The Bartender replies"No, because Im blond and there are 2 250 pound blond guys sitting behind you" "Do you still want to say your joke"

The blind man says"Heck no I don't want to repeat it 3 times"

 

A blond wife one day decides to prove to her husband that blonds are not stupid so she decides to paint the house. The husband returns from work and sees his wife look like she is dressed for winter.He asks"Honey why are you wearing all those coats?".The wife replies "On the paint can it said best results with 2 coats"

 

How do you keep a blond busy?Put them into a circular room and tell them to pick a corner

[Ghostly_Substance]

Nice jokes, should I put the Bestine Cantina back in business ?

[Dorkthehunter]

Fire up the coffee makers! The Bestine Cantina is back!

[plokoon9619]

http://threesecondsmores2.ytmnsfw.com/