DarthTex Posted July 26, 2005 Posted July 26, 2005 Sluis Sector.Alliance Command Center on Mon Calamari. The shipyards floated in the night sky like jewels among the stars. The shipyards were constantly busy either constructing star fighters, capital ships or repairing damaged veterans of the fleet. The Mon Calamari cruiser Independence was nearly halfway complete. Admiral Ackbar was personally helping in the outfitting of the Independence. Although the corridors of the command center were busy, they were fairly quiet as personnel went about their business. The only exception was a young human captain running through the corridors as if in the middle of a recruit obstacle course. For him the finish line was Admiral Ackbar’s office. The captain burst into the Admiral’s office, panting and talking excitedly. “Admiral, Admiral, I have outstanding news!†Finally, after years of hard work I am the Supreme Sith Warlord! Muwhahahaha!! What?? What do you mean "there's only two of us"?
DarthTofu Posted July 27, 2005 Posted July 27, 2005 ... Interesting... Ever here of Fanfictio.net? Many more authors (Several who are better than I, thousands who are far worse {That's not my ego talking, it's experiance}). Anyway, you can post your story there and get reviews. Might've helped if you didn't overuse certain words, like "General" and such. Otherwise, pretty good. Okay, yeah, that was like a fanfiction review, I guess. 12/14/07Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la Not gone, merely marching far away
DarthTex Posted July 27, 2005 Author Posted July 27, 2005 Thanks. I know what you mean about over using words. That's why I'm an engineer and not a literature major. Finally, after years of hard work I am the Supreme Sith Warlord! Muwhahahaha!! What?? What do you mean "there's only two of us"?
DarthTofu Posted July 27, 2005 Posted July 27, 2005 Ah: That means that you would do much better with techno bably than most if systems begin failing and are brought back on-line. 12/14/07Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la Not gone, merely marching far away
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